Why do I do this? - Uncomplicated Spaces

Pull up a chair. Let’s have a chat, shall we? Something has been weighing on my mind a little lately and I wanted to address it. Particularly, I want to address why I do this. Why I post a picture of myself on the internet nearly every day? Why I write all of these posts on how to style this or that item of clothing? The deep down answer is that I used to be a shopaholic.

Honestly, most of the time, I forget my why for all of this. Some days, it’s just what I do at this point. Part of a routine. And some days I’m even frustrated by it all.

But then sometimes, I have moments of great clarity and I do remember why I do this!

I’ll say it again…I do this because I used to be a shopaholic, and in turn, a rampant consumer.

I used to be the girl that would go to the mall for entertainment. Anytime I was bored, I’d go to the mall.

I used to be the girl who had to go to the mall whenever a little bit of money found its way into my pocket. I remember going to college and heading to the mall the first time my student loan cleared my bank account so I could go shopping!

I was the girl who overspent every month on clothes. I remember saying so many times that “credit cards were like free money, until the bill came” and then I’d laugh about it. I used to refer to myself as a “shopaholic” like it was a good thing.

I was that girl with her little kids in a stroller full of shopping bags. I remember as a young mom, packing my kid into a stroller and heading to the mall during “nap time” because he would fall asleep in the stroller and I could shop and try stuff on! And when I had another kid, I bought a double stroller…yippee, more space for shopping bags!

I remember that girl so vividly because she’s not that far behind me. And I know that there are so many girls like that out there!

The girl who just goes out shopping because she’s bored or she needs some sort of escape.

The girl who leaves the mall with her hands laden with shopping bags, only to get it all home and to never wear some of it.

The girl who has nothing to wear but has a closet crammed full of clothes.

The girl who gives zero thought to how her clothes were made and what impact their production had on the lives of the makers or the planet.

But I’m not that girl anymore. I’m happy that I left her behind because she didn’t really have a purpose. She floated through life in a bubble of naivety and with very little awareness outside of that bubble.

And you know what? I will never be the girl who doesn’t buy clothes or only buys clothes a few times a year. I am self-aware enough to know that is just not me. Wardrobe curation has become a hobby for me, just like knitting, sewing or any other number of things that one may enjoy.

But I am the girl who “tries” to buy the majority of her clothes with as little negative impact to the people making it and the environment as possible. The quotations are there to illustrate that I realize it’s not a perfect process but that I believe that progress is better than perfection.

I am the girl who has put focus on building a wardrobe full of beautiful pieces, made from mostly beautiful, natural materials that feel great on my skin. Pieces that I know were purchased from a responsible maker, who considers the well-being of their employees and the environment during production, or in a responsible way, via the secondhand market. Pieces that I will cherish for years.

And yes, I’m that girl that posts pictures of herself on the internet to show that it’s possible to have fewer clothes and to love it all. To be able to make lots of different looks with a smaller number of pieces.

Do I sometimes try challenges and fail? Yup. Do I sometimes go on a spending spree after a failed challenge? You betcha! Will this cycle repeat itself? Most likely!! I am a very flawed human who is trying her best so that her hobby has as little negative impact on herself, other people and the planet as possible.

And maybe you’re that girl, too. The one struggling with a shopping addiction. The one with a closet full of clothes and nothing to wear. The one who never thinks about the impact of her purchases. And if you are, this post is for you. You are not alone!

But maybe you’re not that girl. And if you’re not, this post is also for you. Because at the end of the day, we’re all in this thing called life together, just trying to do the best we can.

If you would like to curb your shopaholic ways, please check out the following posts on How Slow Fashion has Curbed my Shopaholic Tendencies and 9 Ways to Quit Fast Fashion.

And don’t forget to follow me on Instagram to see how I use what I have to make lots of different outfits, and how I now add items to my closet intentionally.

Until next time,


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A graphic that says "I used to be a shopaholic" in black letters overlaid on a blush pint background.

This Post Has 5 Comments

  1. Olga

    I love this post so much, and it’s so in time! I’ve been filling so frustrated with my style lately and I am almost ready for just shopping, shopping an shopping…..You remind to stop, take a deep breath and wait for time I feel that shopping isn’t something to make me feel better, but it is a natural, well planned act of happiness and good mood.

    1. Gillian

      Hi Olga!! Thank you so much for your comment!! And for what it’s worth, I think your clothing is beautiful! But I know how frustrating it can be! I still have to reign myself in from time to time to not shop because I’m bored! Honestly more than I like! It might help to start playing dressup with some of your warmer weather clothes to get excited about what you’ll get to wear soon!

  2. Lauren

    Yes! I am exactly as you have described yourself. I even get that itch sometimes still where I just want to browse stores endlessly when I am bored/have extra cash because that’s just what I use to do. But I’ve learned that it is still dangerous for me to do that. I’ve found other hobbies in the process of trying to avoid being that person again, however, and my eyes have been opened a lot. I have found that I am capable of learning new things and creating beautiful garments and art. I am also grateful for people like you and other bloggers who have educated me in slow fashion and exactly what it means to shop ethically. More times than not, it is thinking about the detrimental effects of fast fashion that help to deter me from shopping mindlessly anymore. Anyway, thank you for your truths!

    1. Gillian

      I don’t think it ever really goes away!! I still find myself wasting time browsing online but I find it much easier to resist things that I’m not actually holding!! But I think the key is exactly as you’ve said…to be cognizant of the weakness and to find other things that you enjoy doing! And definitely thinking of the consequences of fast fashion is enough to deter anyone! Have you watched “The True Cost” documentary? It’s a good one!

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