Where I grew up, Christmas was on steroids. A lot of people focused solely on the act of giving the biggest, and best, assortment of presents. Whether they could afford it or not. The Joneses were, and probably still are, alive and well.

But I don’t think that is atypical of Christmases nowadays. According to a Gallup poll:

“33% of Americans plan to spend at least $1,000 on Christmas gifts, 22% say they will spend between $500 and $999, 29% will spend between $100 and $499, and 3% will spend less than $100”

It’s telling that the largest percentage of people will spend more than $1,000 on gifts this Christmas. And entirely believable. I suspect that a lot will spend much more than that buying an excessive amount of stuff.

But I don’t want this to be the typical experience for our family. I will admit that during the first 6 years that we were parents, we did fall into the trap of buying a ton of presents for our kids. Presents that ended up being a waste of money most often.

I used to approach Christmas as an excuse to shop and buy “cute” clothes and toys for my kids. I would often start off with good intentions, such as a budget or a certain number of toys, but those ideas were never held on to for very long.

However, once I started downsizing our possessions, the last thing that I wanted was to add in any more unwanted stuff. So, my approach towards Christmas needed to change too.

We are extremely fortunate that we can meet all of our kids needs year round without any difficulty. Our kids never need for anything.

But with that privilege also comes responsibility. The responsibility to not raise materialistic children, who then become materialistic adults.

Our society already has a problem with stuff and the excess accumulation and disposal of said stuff. I would like to hope that we can turn that around by teaching our kids that having much more than we need is not necessary and is actually harmful.

How I Shop for my Kids at Christmas

In order to treat our kids, but not excessively, I go by a little rhyme that I heard a long time ago. You may have heard it too (or some variation of it):

“Something they want;

something they need;

something to wear;

something to read;

something to do;

something for “me”;

something for the family.”

The “want” is generally a big ticket item. The thing that they go to sleep hoping that they get.

I use the “need” to gift them with things such as outdoor winter clothing, or sporting equipment.

The wear and read are pretty self explanatory. We get the majority of our reading material from the library so I use this as a opportunity to get them a nice hardcover book. I have also used this for a magazine subscription in the past.

The “do” is an experience for them such as a movie ticket or tickets to a sporting event.

The “me” is a personalized gift for them such as an ornament, photo, or handwritten letter.

And the “family” gift is something that we can all enjoy together such as a family outing or a board game.

This little rhyme means that I am much more thoughtful when buying presents for my kids. Prior to buying anything, I take into consideration the things that they have asked for and the things that I think they need and then I fill in the parts of the rhyme.

Once the gifts have been bought, I am done. No more going out to “look around” and coming home with a bunch more stuff! This method of shopping for Christmas gifts is much less stressful as well.

How I Handle Gifts from Family

We have a fairly unique situation in that we live very far away from our families and do not spent Christmas vacation with any of them.

The people who do send our kids presents typically ask us for ideas of what they can get the kids. So we suggest a few things that the kids want or need.

This seems to work well for everyone involved: the kids get something they want, we aren’t getting inundated with gifts that the kids lose interest in quickly and the giver does not have the stress of shopping for the “perfect” gift.

This may not work for everyone, but you can always offer suggestions to those people who gift your children with presents.

What tips do you have for Christmas with kids?